DO I LOOK LIKE AN INTROVERT ?

There were some moments in my life when I occasionally feel too bad about life. The moments in which I am alone , the moments in which there is nobody around me to share my thoughts, the moments where I hardly see smile on my face , the moments where everybody feel so happy about them but left me alone in my loneliness.

It’s not the particular circumstances but the particular time that made me fall in this situation. At this point of time I watch the environment around me and I feel too bad to have it. I want to talk with somebody to share my views but not everybody seems interested in it. I want to tell someone about my problems and my life but it seems nobody cared to be a part of boring talk from me.

I always want to capture the good moments around me on which I can believe on, on which I can proud on , on which I can live on, but as soon as I went to capture them I found myself into the dearth of peace. I feel lazy to enjoy the moment, to enjoy accompany, to enjoy the trips results me to go again into the relentless reality around me.

Sometimes I try to break the boundaries to talk with someone but my nature come again as a roadblock and left me alone in expressionless and cunning personality. I always want to be a part of some party and celebrations but as soon as I went to them I can’ crack jokes, I can’t able to attract the attentions, I can’t speak continuously to show my wealth and knowledge and yet again I turned into the boring personality.

There were the moments when I really care to do something great in public , to do something for the audience , to do something for the followers but as soon as I went to them to share my views they wonder about my personality , as I speak I speak very less , as I try to involve my involvement is negligible, as I try to relate I can't relate , as I express they can't understand. The darkness that lie in my character is soulful to me but the same is equally boring for others.

What if I had been an extrovert might be life would be good , I will be able to participate in all those parties , all those trips , I would easily be able to catch all the attention, I would be in a position to tell my love that I love you in style, I would be able to say all those people that I care for you with out any  hesitation . I would be full of friends in all the moment, I wouldn't be celebrating my birthday all alone these years. Might be my friends, relatives would be caring to give a call on at least weekend, I would be having some people around me to whom I would be able to share my thoughts but life would be different I wouldn't be a writer , I would not be a thinker, I would not be an artist and I would not have written this post.